Category Archives: Thoughts On Change

The JOY of solitude

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Have you done Mel Robbins exercise yet?

Basically it’s an exercise to see where you can bring more HAPPINESS & JOY into your life. if you missed my blog post you can read the blog post here ‘What brings you JOY and what fills YOUR days’.

What’s your relationship with solitude?

Do you like spending time alone?

There will no doubt be two camps who answer this question very differently.

The introverts will say YES.

The extroverts will say? I don’t know what the extroverts will say, maybe you can tell me?

I know introverts will say YES as I am an introvert and one of my favourite things to do is spend time alone, solitude brings me much JOY.

Why does solitude bring me JOY?

Firstly, being an introvert solitude is how I recharge my batteries. Solitude is how I gain enough energy to be able to function when in other people’s company. Time in solitude for introverts is just as important as oxygen is!

Solitude gives me time to think. I have a very active mind (doesn’t everyone 🤔) and I need time alone to process things and clear my head.

I don’t know what the extroverts will say – that’s why I’m asking the question?

Whether you are an introvert or an extrovert, do you like spending time in solitude?

Do you find JOY in solitude?

Whether you are an introvert or an extrovert, much can be learned about yourself or the introverts in your life from Susan Cain’s brilliant book ‘Quiet’.

I’d love to know your thoughts.

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If so download my free ebook  ‘The A-Z of Effective Change’ below and you are all signed up! 

Thanks for reading 🙏

Siobhain

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The JOY of reading 📚

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In my blog post What brings you JOY and what fills YOUR days’ I wrote about the 2 lists that Mel Robbins suggests we create and whether those 2 lists align.​

Basically it’s an exercise to see where you can bring more HAPPINESS & JOY into your life.

I have much to be HAPPY & JOYFUL about but my days are filled with an overarching sense of sadness and loss.

There are glimpses of HAPPINESS & JOY but always tinged with sadness and loss.

That’s just my life at the moment and I’ll work through it. Some days it’s so hard but my Dad’s memory and the life he lived and gave to our family deserves to be honoured.

One of the JOYFUL activities in my life is reading.

The only thing I love more than reading is writing.

​The thing with reading (especially physical books) is that you need lots of time.​

Listening to audiobooks also takes time but you can listen to them while doing something else – driving, walking etc.

Getting the time to read physical books is a work in progress.

I don’t like reading a few pages at a time, I much prefer immersing myself in a physical book for hours at a time.

This makes creating the required time for reading difficult.

That said, it is totally worth it.

When I do dedicate the required time to reading I feel so JOYFUL & HAPPY and that JOY & HAPPINESS lasts well beyond when my reading finishes 📚

Over the past few years for many reasons, I haven’t been able to dedicate as much time to reading physical books as I would have liked.

I’m prioritising reading from now on – I want to be more JOYFUL and reading is an endless source of joy for me.

What could you prioritise that brings you HAPPINESS & JOY?

Does reading bring you JOY?

I have always wanted to create a blog post to share with you the books I have read and love. This will take me a while and isn’t something I can commit to this year but here is a list of some of my favourite books that I have previously shared with you.

Every single book on this list has changed my life for the better and can do the same for you.

BOOKS & MENTORS.pdf ❤️

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If so download my free ebook  ‘The A-Z of Effective Change’ below and you are all signed up! 

Thanks for reading 🙏

Siobhain

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The JOY of Netflix ❤️

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What do you do to relax?

​​From the list of what brings me JOY one if the things I do to relax is watch Netflix.​

I arrived at the Netflix party late. Friends at work had been taking about Netflix for ages and as I didn’t have it I could only imagine the JOY they all shared from it.

When I left work in late 2021, I needed a break from all things work and so I looked for something to do that wasn’t work!

This was difficult for me.

Writing had become work, social media had become work, reading and listening to podcasts had become work as all I read and listened to was business books & podcasts.

My entire existence and everything I did had become work!

What could I focus on that wasn’t any of the above?

The answer was Netflix ❤️

The productivity & hustle culture are not fans of Netflix as they think watching Netflix isn’t time well spent.

I totally disagree with this.

I think watching Netflix is absolutely TIME SPENT VERY WELL!

Here are the many benefits of Netflix and why I think it’s a great way to spend your time and relax,

• Netflix is relaxing – you need to rest, recover and relax to function optimally

• Netflix is educational – there are some incredible documentaries on Netflix – some of the best I’ve seen are Downfall, Dope, Seaspiracy.

• Netflix is inspiring – there are some brilliant inspirational biography documentaries on Netflix which I love. Stultz is my favourite- if you haven’t seen it, I highly recommend it.

• Netflix combines genius writing with genius acting and genius cinematography. My favourite series include Breaking Bad (the best TV i have ever watched!), Ozark, Narcos, Narcos Mexico & The Queen’s Gambit.

• It’s mobile – you can watch Netflix anywhere at any time on your mobile phone – efficiency at it’s best

• Netflix is very affordable – Netflix is relatively cheap, the biggest cost is your time!

The documentary that inspired this email is ‘Human – the world within’.

If you watch one thing on Netflix, let it be this! ‘Human – the world within’ is a most fascinating documentary series on the complexity, vastness and powerful machine we all inhabit – THE HUMAN BODY.

What do you do to relax that brings you JOY?

Have you found the JOY of Netflix?

Do you have any Netflix recommendations? I’m always looking for new things to watch!

Would you like to join my weekly newsletter?

If so download my free ebook  ‘The A-Z of Effective Change’ below and you are all signed up! 

Thanks for reading 🙏

Siobhain

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What brings YOU joy and what fills YOUR days?

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I recently heard Mel Robbins talk about how to find the happiness you once had. 

Mel suggests you make two lists.

  • The first list is what brings you joy or what were you doing at a happier time in your life?
  • The second list is how do you currently spend your days?

You then compare the lists to see if your days are filled with what makes you happy and joyful or not!

If these lists align then great – you already have happy & joyful days.

If these lists don’t align you need to align them to bring more happiness & joy into your life.

Sounds simple right?

I followed Mel’s advice and made 2 lists.

What makes me happy & joyful or what was I doing at a happier time in my life?

That’s an easy list to make – time with loved ones, time alone, reading, writing, creating, learning, travelling, photography, exercise & relaxing.

Are my days filled with these activities?

The honest answer is not as much as I would like.

If I could spend my time doing all of the above my life would not just be joyful, it would be blissful! 

This tells me it’s time to make changes.

Ironically what used to bring me immense joy and made up most of my time before was work.

Work no longer brings me the joy it used to which highlights where we find joy can change as we grow and evolve.

I do want to work again in the future but it will be very different to how I worked before. 

  • What brings you happiness & joy or what were you doing at a happier time in your life?
  • How do you currently spend your days?
  • Are your lists aligned?

Would you like to join my weekly newsletter?

If so download my free ebook  ‘The A-Z of Effective Change’ below and you are all signed up! 

Thanks for reading, 

Siobhain

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You Are Enough!

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There are a few concepts that I keep coming back to year after year, ENOUGH is one of those concepts.

WE HAVE ENOUGH

WE DO ENOUGH

WE ARE ENOUGH!

Movie star Jim Carrey is most widely known for his comedic genius. More recently he is known for sharing his spiritual path which is light years away from the glitzy movie star life he used to lead. In a recent video Jim was talking about retiring from movies, three sentences he said really hit a chord with me and have become a mantra that I carry with me every day.

I HAVE ENOUGH

​I’VE DONE ENOUGH

I AM ENOUGH

Imagine having such a sense of fulfilment and contentment within yourself that all you currently have is ENOUGH, all you have done to this date is ENOUGH and all that you currently are is ENOUGH. You can view Jim’s video here, 

No matter where we are in our lives, starting from this baseline of having ENOUGH, having done ENOUGH and being ENOUGH is incredibly liberating.

Starting and finishing EVERY DAY with this realisation means that everything we get, everything we do and everything we become is then a BONUS!​

WE HAVE ENOUGH

WE DO ENOUGH

WE ARE ENOUGH!

ENOUGH doesn’t stop us from wanting to have more, do more and be more. It does however, allow us to be content with what we have, what we have done and what we are while we pursue all we want.

DO YOU HAVE ENOUGH TODAY?

​HAVE YOU DONE ENOUGH TODAY?

​ARE YOU ENOUGH TODAY?

Over the past few years my life has changed a huge amount and I’ve experienced more loss in the past 5 years than I have in my entire lifetime. ​

Even with all this loss, I absolutely know I have ENOUGH, I have done ENOUGH and I am ENOUGH.

Knowing this is hugely comforting, empowering & liberating. ​

Remember whatever you have, do and are – YOU ARE ENOUGH.​

You are enough today.

You are enough every day.

You are enough, we all are.

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Download your free ebook The A-Z of Effective Change below and you are all signed up! 

Thanks for reading,

Siobhain

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Less is More

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The underlying message in Less is More is that we don’t need more to be happy, we can be happier and more content with less. For the past few years all my goals have centred around Less is More principles which have brought me so much peace, joy, contentment and happiness.

Every year I add a few more learnings to my less is more principles. This year I’m adding the benefits of having more trust, more patience and more acceptance as these were my three key learnings this year.

Not in a ‘I’ve learned something new’ way but in a ‘painful, my heart has been ripped from my chest and my soul is exhausted’ sort of way! That’s the thing with learnings, they mostly don’t come wrapped in nice fancy paper – deep learning is usually accompanied by some sort of deep pain.

Here’s why I’m adding trust, patience and acceptance to my less is more principles,

LESS CONTROL, MORE TRUST

We control very little in this life yet can spend much time trying to control things. T

he only thing we really have any control over is ourselves. Everything outside of ourselves – every person and every thing is totally out of our control.

I would take this a little deeper and say some of our own lives are also out of our control – there seems to be an invisible force aligning us with what is meant for us and misaligning us with what isn’t meant for us.

The less we try to control, the more we can trust. Trust can be placed anywhere yet the most important place for your trust is in yourself.

🙏 Trust your intuition.

🙏 Trust your dreams.

🙏 Trust your inner compass.

🙏 Trust the divine timing of your life.

When you trust yourself and all that you are, your life will evolve exactly how it is meant to.

That’s how important and powerful self trust is.

LESS FRUSTRATION, MORE PATIENCE

Frustration is a normal human emotion. As normal as it is, it’s usually more of a signal pointing to deeper, more vulnerable and negative emotions that we are not expressing.

Patience is a valuable skill we can learn to reduce frustration which also reduces all the deeper, more vulnerable and negative emotions hidden behind our frustration.

The more patience we have, the less frustration we feel.

The more patience we have, the more joy we feel.

LESS RESISTANCE, MORE ACCEPTANCE

Resistance causes pain.

The more we resist, the more pain we will experience.

There is no end to the amount of things we can resist in our lives yet with everything we resist, we create more pain.

Acceptance is a much lighter and positive emotion and has a magical way of eliminating pain, replacing it with joy.

Eckhart Tolle says,

‘It may look like as if the situations in our life are creating the suffering but ultimately this is not so – it is our resistance to the situations that causes the suffering’.

I find this quote has deep wisdom to it, practicing less resistance and more acceptance is not easy yet it brings much peace.

During the challenging times of my life I have found that some days the only thing I can do is practice acceptance. Acceptance doesn’t mean I like what has happened yet it does mean I stop resisting it.

  • Resistance brings a never ending cycle of pain.
  • Acceptance has a way of easing that pain, the more acceptance the less pain.

Here are more LESS IS MORE principles that I have built up over the past few years,

DO LESS, BE MORE

Sometimes I find life is just one big long to do list – this doesn’t bring me joy it brings me anxiety! Having less on my ‘to do list’ and more on my ‘to be list’ brings me peace, joy, contentment and happiness. I want to continue to DO LESS and enjoy BEING more!

WORK LESS, HAVE MORE TIME

For 25 years I worked in the corporate world which brought me much joy, many beautiful friendships and a certain amount of wealth. I left the corporate world 3+ years ago and my work was replaced with the gift of time. I want to continue to work less and spend my precious time in other areas of my life that are important to me and that bring me immense joy.

LESS EARNING, MORE LEARNING

This will be my 4th year in a row earning less money. This reduction in earnings has given me the gift of time which brings me more joy than any amount of money ever could. Over the past 3+ years I have used this time to learn more – learn more about myself, the world around me, what interests me, what work I want to do in the future, how to create passive income and how to earn more.

I’ll never return to the hours I used to work nor will I ever return to how I used to earn money. Less earning and more learning has taught me a different way that suits me better. In 2025 I am excited to get back to the work I love and the inevitable side effect of earning money again!

ACHIEVE LESS, ENJOY MORE

I’m not a big achievement chaser, enjoyment is way more important to me than achievement. Achievements aren’t hugely important to me yet I do have ambition – ambition to work towards and fulfil my dreams. On this journey towards my dreams, enjoyment of every step is much more important to me than achievements.

If I’m enjoying life, that’s achievement enough for me.

LESS SPEED, MORE PROGRESS

In my 20s, 30s and early 40s I lived life at a fast pace – always going, always doing, always striving, moving at the speed of light. A few years ago this all changed and I started to slow down. This slower lifestyle brings me more peace, tranquility and bliss than any fast paced life ever could!

Ironically I seem to be getting more done. Dr Wayne Dyer sums up this concept with his quote ‘Doing nothing yet getting it all done’.

LESS RUSHING, MORE RELAXING

  • Rushing makes me feel under pressure and stressed which is not enjoyable for me.
  • Relaxing makes me feel happy and peaceful which is immensely enjoyable for me.

I choose relaxing over rushing every single day.

LESS CONSUMING, MORE CREATING

For many years I spent much time consuming a huge amount of content – physical books, audiobooks, podcasts, YouTube videos and scrolling social media etc. That was until I experienced burnout and stopped all content consumption.

I still love consuming content in these ways, I just don’t love or do so much of it! These days I consume less and create more. I write more, learn more about writing, share more of my writing and I am developing more depth, meaning, openness and transparency in my writing.

BUY LESS, USE MORE

In terms of material things I have plenty and enough of everything. I used to love shopping for all sorts of things – clothes, make up, fancy toiletries, stuff for our home, books, stationary, the list goes on and on. The problem with this constant shopping was that I ended up with many things that I just didn’t use and eventually things that I no longer liked.

The irony is now that I have less, I use (and like) what I have more.

That’s it, my LESS IS MORE principles for 2025.

Ironically, with so much LESS comes so much MORE peace, joy, contentment and happiness.

​What would your LESS IS MORE PRINCIPLES be?

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Thanks for reading,

Siobhain

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Setting Dream Driven Goals

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In my blog post ‘Goal Setting Templates’ I mention SMART goals and Brendon Burchard’s DUMB goals.

I use the best of both of these templates to create my own goal setting template.

It’s high level but is detailed enough to give me sufficient direction to set goals,

  1. What are my DREAM DRIVEN GOALS?
  2. WHY are these goals important to me?
  3. HOW will I achieve these goals?
  4. What METRICS will I use to measure progress towards these goals?

I answer the above questions in detail for each category of my life. As outlined in my Wheel of Life below, the categories of my life are Sense of Self, Relationships, Health, Work, Finance, Social Life, Environment & Contribution. 

You can use this Wheel of Life or create your own version.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  1. What are my DREAM DRIVEN GOALS

Remembering Brendon Burchard’s DUMB goals

What are your DREAMS for each area of your life?

What would be a DREAM come true?

This is where we DREAM BIG about what we want for our lives.

There are no limits or obstacles in DREAM DRIVEN GOALS – just DREAMS!

HOW BIG WILL YOU DREAM?


  1. WHY are these DREAM DRIVEN GOALS important to me?

Simon Sinek in his highly viewed Ted Talk and bestselling book says to START WITH WHY and that is where I start with goal setting.

Understanding my WHY not only supports the goal setting process but it also keeps me going when times get tough, which they inevitably will.

What is your WHY?

WHY do you want to FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS in each area of your life?

WHY are your DREAM DRIVEN GOALS important to you?


  1. HOW will I achieve these goals?

The HOW is the actions required to move closer to your goals.

What ACTION do you need to take to get closer to your goals.

What do you need to STOP DOING to move you closer to your goals?

What do you need to LEARN to move you closer to your goals?


  1. What METRICS will I use to measure progress towards these goals?

Metrics are incredibly important as without them we don’t know how much progress we are making and whether we are moving towards or away from our goals.

What metrics will you use to measure your progress?

‘WHAT GETS MEASURED GETS IMPROVED’ is a quote by Peter Drucker that is as true today as when he said it 40+ years ago.

 

Whatever your goals are, I wish you success, love, health and happiness as you live your best life every day 😊

Do you want to join my weekly newsletter?

If so download my free ebook  ‘The A-Z of Effective Change’ below and you are all signed up! 

Thanks for reading,

Siobhain

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Goal Setting Templates

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SMART is used universally across the globe and is well known in the world of strategy as a popular goal setting template. I have used SMART but I never fully aligned with it, I always felt it was limiting and wasn’t creative enough.

I highly recommend you create your own goal setting template depending on what aligns with you and what doesn’t.

Here’s what I like and don’t like about SMART goal setting,

S = Specific – be specific about what you want to accomplish

I like this part as if you’re not specific, you are vague and vague isn’t going tp get you anywhere!

M = Measurable – use metrics to measure progress towards your goal

I’m a big fan of metrics, without metrics you don’t know if you are moving towards or away from your goals.

A = Achievable/Attainable – is your goal achievable & attainable?

This is one of the parts of SMART that I don’t align with. I prefer to set goals that aren’t achievable. I prefer to set big, audacious, almost unrealistic goals – anything else feels limiting to me. You may not be able to achieve your big, audacious, unrealistic goals with the current resources you have but who knows what the future will bring.

DREAM BIG and don’t worry about whether it’s achievable or not, the process will get you further than you can imagine!

R = Relevant – is your goal relevant?

This is another part of SMART that I don’t align with. Goals may be relevant today and irrelevant tomorrow and so only setting relevant goals also feels limiting to me.

T = Timely – does your goal have a timeline?

I half align and half misalign with this. I agree goals should have timelines but I don’t think they should be set in stone. I prefer timelines to be flexible and changeable with an awareness that everything mostly unfolds in its own time, if we have the patience to allow this.

 

The goal setting template that I absolutely love and really align with is Brendon Burchard’s DUMB goals! I love Brendon’s energy, excitement and enthusiasm when explaining what DUMB goals are.

This is what is needed when goal setting – POSITIVE AND INFECTIOUS ENERGY, EXCITEMENT AND ENTHUSIASM

If you watch one video this week, let it be this one!

Brendon Burchard’s DUMB goals

D = Dream Driven 

These goals are influenced and powered by your dreams, your destiny and your passions. What will make you feel meaningful and alive?

U = Uplifting 

These goals are compelling, attractive, fun, exciting and driven by gain. We are way more likely to achieve goals that are compelling, attractive, fun, exciting and driven by gain than the opposite. 

M = Method Friendly 

What practices or methods do you have that make your goals easy to achieve? If you don’t have the methods to achieve your goals, you will need to create these methods.

B = Behaviour Driven 

Your behaviours become habits and your habits move you closer to your goals. Your habitual behaviour then becomes the driving force behind your dreams.

 

No matter what goal setting template you use or how you set goals I echo what Brendon says at the end of his video

‘I don’t want you to be realistic anymore. I want you to advance with reckless abandon towards your dreams by just being DUMB – setting up those very simple Dream Driven, Uplifting, Method Friendly, Behaviour Driven goals that fire you up and get you up every single day’ Brendon Burchard

I wish you joy, happiness, health and contentment on your goal setting journey 😊

Do you want to join my weekly newsletter?

If so download my free ebook  ‘The A-Z of Effective Change’ below and you are all signed up! 

Thanks for reading,

Siobhain

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The Power of Procrastination

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In my blog posts ‘The 9R’s to Eliminate Overwhelm’ and ‘Il Dolce Far Niente’ I wrote about ways to eliminate overwhelm, another way of dealing with overwhelm is through procrastination.

Procrastination is defined as ‘the habit of voluntarily delaying an important task usually by focusing on less urgent, more enjoyable and easier tasks instead’.

The internet has many videos & articles on how to overcome procrastination, how to stop procrastination, and how to deal with and how to cope with procrastination. All of these videos and articles have one central theme – that procrastination is a bad thing.

I think procrastination is a good thing and we can learn much from it.

I procrastinate all the time – show me something that’s boring, tedious, takes ages, or that I don’t like doing and I can literally delay it forever.

This teaches me a lot about what I like to do and what I don’t like to do.

What I delay is always, without exception things I don’t like doing. 

What I don’t delay is always, without exception things I like to do

This makes procrastination a great teacher.

Procrastination teaches us what we don’t like to do.

Procrastination also teaches us what we do like to do.

 

In terms of overwhelm there are a few ways to utilise procrastination and treat it as a friend not a foe,

 

1.Delay what you don’t like doing –  move what you don’t like doing to tomorrow, next week, next month or next year. The simple act of delaying what you don’t like to do can reduce overwhelm significantly.

 

2. Delay what you do like doing –  just because you like doing something doesn’t mean it needs to get done today! Move what you do like doing to tomorrow, next week, next month or next year. The simple act of delaying what you do like to do can also reduce overwhelm significantly.

 

3. Outsource what you can. I’m a firm believer in outsourcing everything that others can do for you. This frees you up to focus solely on what only you can do in your life and business.

Note: It’s more enjoyable to outsource what you don’t like to do but you can also outsource what you do like to do. The most important thing is that you free up your time to focus solely on what only you can do in your life and business. 

This reduces overwhelm dramatically as your ‘to do list’ become someone else’s ‘to do list’!

My blog post ‘How to Free Up Your Time Using Online Outsourcing’ can support you with online outsourcing.

 

4. Prioritise what you absolutely have to get done – My blog post The Priority Matrix can support you with this. The simple act of prioritising can reduce overwhelm significantly as you realise everything doesn’t have to be done straight away!

 

How can you leverage the power of procrastination?

What can procrastination teach you?

Want to join my weekly newsletter?

If so download my free ebook  ‘The A-Z of Effective Change’ below and you are all signed up! 😊

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Siobhain

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Il Dolce Far Niente

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Following on from my blog post ‘The 9Rs to Eliminate Overwhelm’  another concept that helps to eliminate overwhelm is Il Dolce Far Niente.

The Italian concept of ‘Il Dolce Far Niente’ translates to

‘THE SWEETNESS OF DOING NOTHING’.​

When I got injured skiing in Italy in early 2023 I had loads of time on my hands.

​I spent this time watching Italians practise ‘THE SWEETNESS OF DOING NOTHING’.

  • The Italians seem to take their time and savour enjoyment of the simple things in life
  • The Italians spend hours eating many courses of food and enjoying the best of coffee, wine and other aperitifs
  • The Italians walk as if time is their best friend and as if they have plenty of it
  • The Italians don’t seem to be in any rush to get to or to do anything
  • The Italians are intent on the enjoyment of time as just that – time

​When in Italy do as the Italians do and so I used this precious time to practise ‘THE SWEETNESS OF DOING NOTHING’.

I had long lazy breakfasts & lunches, I had midday naps, I sat in cafes sipping coffee and eating cake, I walked around the area we were staying in with no real direction just aimlessly wandering yet enjoying the journey.

​I sat and listened to Italians in conversation, their language is like music. The words I didn’t understand, the changing tone of their voices, their uplifting laughs, their hand gestures. You can hear their expressions of affection even without understanding the words.

​I did lots of nothing, lots of just nothing – enjoying THE SWEETNESS OF DOING NOTHING.

While my body was sore and in pain from my injury, my mind was slowing down and becoming immensely peaceful.

THE SWEETNESS OF DOING NOTHING made me feel good during a very challenging time and I brought this little piece of Italy home with me to savour and enjoy when I need it.

Do you practice THE SWEETNESS OF DOING NOTHING?

Do you think THE SWEETNESS OF DOING NOTHING would support you to slow down and eliminate overwhelm?

​Eat, Pray, Love was made into a film and this clip is where Il Dolce Far Niente is explained to Julia Roberts, Il Dolce Far Niente .

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If so download my free ebook  ‘The A-Z of Effective Change’ below and you are all signed up! 😊

Thanks for reading,

Siobhain

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